Epic postgame post, part 1

So the reason I haven’t posted anything post-ECC is because I have this giant list of things to say and I was making the mistake of trying to finish writing each one before putting the post up on the site, which is difficult as I remain pressed for both time and functional brain cells. So I’m just going to start posting unrelated things in a disorganized fashion, because that is just how your Militia Cheerleader rolls.

Item: Backseat Coach and I want to go to Austin for the Superbowl so badly I cannot even tell you. Whether we can or not depends on a situation completely out of our control, but I will keep you posted since I know you’re all on the edge of your seats wondering who the hell else but BSC would be able to send out Twitter play-by-play messages so snarky that the IWFL had to edit his Twitter posts [ref]Yeah, I know they’re called “tweets”. I’m sorry, I just cannot deal with that.[/ref] before adding them to their own feed. (Oh I am SO not making that up. Details forthcoming.)

Item: Oh my God, Toin Coss Announcer Guy[ref]See end of second full paragraph here for reference.[/ref] You know those scenes in movies or TV where someone’s talking but they’re so tired that they keep falling asleep and then someone nudges them and they wake up and say a few more words before falling asleep again? My new theory is that that’s what’s going on with the announcer for the Militia games. I’m serious. There was a whole lot of this:

Announcer: And here are your Boston Milisher[ref][Seriously, he says “Milisher”. Don’t get me wrong – I was born and raised in Boston and am certainly known to leave my R’s off the end of some words, but I don’t think I do the thing where I then add them to the ends of words that didn’t have them in the first place. Incidentally, he also says “the D.C. Deevers”, but I’m leaving that one alone.[/ref] captains: Kelly Barker, Mia Brickhouse, Allison Cahill, and….
[pause]
Me and Barker’s parents: MOLLY GOODWIN.
Announcer: …and Molly Goodwin.

Item: Also someone should probably tell them they might want to switch to the radio edits of a few songs. Just sayin’.

And on that note, Item: Overheard at the ECC:

[M.I.A.’s “Paper Planes” plays over the loudspeaker.]
Backseat Coach: Why are they playing this song?
Me: What? I like this song.
BSC: It’s all…gunshots.
Me: It’s not all gunshots. It’s gunshots and a cash register and a Clash riff.
BSC: OK, I guess that is a cash register.
Me: Of course it is. She needs it for after she takes your mon-ay.[ref]That line is a lot better if you imagine she’s saying “Monet,” by the way. Makes me think of Pierce Brosnan in Thomas Crown Affair. Yay![/ref] BSC: Well, I still disapprove.

Item: I can’t understand why I didn’t notice this as a problem before, but I became quite concerned early in the game that yelling “Defense!” in an encouraging fashion sounds a lot like yelling “Divas!” in an encouraging fashion. Or maybe just to me because I can’t hear worth a damn, which is why I had to ask whether we were “going to the ‘ship” or “going to the show” since in fact, what it sounded like to me was that we were “going to the shit” which, I suppose, could be considered accurate also.

So! Part 2 of this post will hopefully follow in a few hours, with extra bonus photos of Backseat Coach’s Crocodile Dundee hat if you’re lucky. And I think you are, my friends, I think you are.